Beautiful Lies
by TheHappyOwl
Summary: Holly had it all; a job that paid well, a beautiful home, great friends and, above all, an amazing boyfriend by the name of Dean Winchester. Life seems to be going smoothly until she discovers the lies. This is an AU story. Rated M for later chapters.
1. Chapter 1

Hello lovely readers! I've been out of action for a long while, very tacky of me. But I am back and bringing something new with me. I hope you all enjoy! Please review and let me know if there is anything you would like to see in later chapters. xx

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She shivered and hugged her jacket around her tighter. The wind was bitter, howling as it cut through the trees. It blew her dark hair around her face and she spent most of the time tucking it back behind her ears. Overhead the dark clouds continued to roll across the sky, blocking out the warmth of the sun. Thunder gave a low warning growl as lightning flashed in the distance. It was just another October day. She looked around the area once again but nobody was there. With a sigh she looked out across the lake that she stood before. She was trying to comprehend why they would have to meet out here, of all the places they could have gone. She exhaled loudly and bent down, picking a wild flower. She was engrossed in examining the orange and white petals and didn't hear the footsteps behind her. Moments later a warm, strong body was pressed against her from behind, soft breath tickled her ear.

"Holly," a rough but warm voice whispered.

"Dean," she grinned, letting the wild flower fall to the ground. She turned around slowly and shining green eyes met her hazel eyes. Their faces were so close that their noses touched. He dipped his head and pressed his lips to hers. The kiss was warm and there was just enough passion to make her heart beat faster than normal. When they broke away from each other he took a step back and handed her a bunch of flower. She smiled as she took the flowers; vibrant yellow lilies with matching yellow gerberas, and an array of blue and purple orchids.

"Thank you," she said, her smile not disappearing.

"You're welcome..." Dean looked as if he had more to say but fell silent.

"What?" Holly asked, moving closer to Dean. In silence Dean wrapped an arm around her shoulder and pulled her close. Holly was grateful for the warmth. After a few minutes Dean took Holly's hand and they walked for a bit. The silence between them wasn't awkward, it was comfortable. They came to a stop and Holly shivered again, as if remembering all of a sudden they were outside in the cold.

"Come on, let's go home," Dean said as he pulled Holly close again. They made their way back through the thick of trees until they found the road.

"Oh my God! My car's gone!" Holly gasped as she looked around, unable to see her red, 1969 Camaro.

"Yeah, I took it," Dean smirked.

"What?" Holly laughed.

"I know where you keep the spare key so I took it, so I could take your car back to your house," Dean told her as he got into the Impala. Holly shook her head and got into the Impala with Dean. They drove the short distance back into town. It took Holly a moment to realise that they were headed for industrial part of the town, and her house was on the other side of town. She had assumed that they would head back to her house.

"Where are we going?" she asked as she looked to Dean.

"My place," Dean said quietly. Holly fell into a shocked silence. They had been seeing each other for nearly a year now and Dean had never taken Holly to his place. He was always saying that he didn't really have a place. When they both had spare time to be together it was either at Holly's or they would head out of town for a couple of days. She had once questioned him about where he lived and if they could go there but he turned cold, changed the subject and refused to talk about it. She prodded at the subject a few times and finally got a brief story of how he didn't get along with his brother and they lived together. He had been distant for dyas after that so Holly didn't ask again and let it go. Finally Dean pulled into a back alley and stopped the car. Holly got out and looked around and her expression made Dean speak up.

"Don't worry, it's better inside," he said. Holly followed Dean through a door. "This is the garage,"

"Whoa!" Holly breathed. Various cars and motorbikes were all in their own bays. They came to a set of spiral stairs, before ascending Holly stole another glance a the garage. They entered a door and followed a hallway. Eventually, after several turns, they stepped into an immense room. Holly's heels clicked on the marble floor. She stopped and took in the many bookshelves within the room, the stone pillars, the large mahogany table and chairs in the middle of the room. The area was so large she was amazed at how she had ever missed the building.


	2. Chapter 2

Holly, still unable to form words, walked around the bookshelves observing all of the different books. Many of the books looked centuries old and she gingerly reached out to run her fingers across the spines of some. They were redolent of paper and ink that had been shelved for far too long, she enjoyed the scent. Some of the books had strange titles, others she couldn't even read. When she came to the end of the room she turned back to Dean, her eyes swimming with amazement. He had watched her the whole time, wanting nothing more than to leave her to her own devices, let her relish in the room she would gladly never leave. She looked like a child that had been left free roam of a candy store. He had quickly learnt, in the early days of their relationship, that Holly loved to read and would often find her with her head in a book. At her house there were not enough shelves to store all the books.

"This is amazing," Holly breathed as she moved closer to Dean.

"Glad you like it," Dean smiled, taking her hand and pulling her close.

"You should have bought me here sooner," Holly said, her voice soft as if she were in an actual library.

"Yeah...Well..." Dean trailed off then. "How about we order Thai for dinner?"

"Sounds good," Holly beamed. They phoned and ordered the meals they usually got then sat at the end of one of the mahogany tables. They talked about nothing in particular until Dean stood and walked up another spiral staircase. Holly listened as a door creaked open, she could hear Dean's voice and moments later he was back. She realised he must have timed the delivery. He placed the food on the table and disappeared through a door before he returned with two forks and two plates.

They ate and talked, joked and laughed. Holly wondered why this couldn't have been sooner. She wasn't sure what the problem was with bringing her here. Dean was relaxed and didn't seem to have a worry in the world. He disappeared through the door again, which Holly determined to be to the kitchen, to get drinks. When he returned he had a glass of wine for her and a beer for himself. She thanked him and sipped on the fragrant Shiraz. They hadn't spent a few weekends together, both having worked. Holly was overjoyed that everything was so relaxed. She'd had her doubts that the night wouldn't proceed any further when Dean said they were going to his place. Half an hour later they had finished eating and Dean cleared the plates and leftover's away. When he came back he stood behind Holly and bent down to place a kiss to her exposed neck.

"Come on..." he said as he took her hand. They walked down a hallway and stopped at a door which Dean opened and Holly walked in.

"This your room?" she asked, looking at the very simple room.

"Yep...I'll be right back, just going to lock up the Impala," Dean said then turned and left. Holly moved into the bedroom and looked at the shelf above the bed; an Ipod, headphones, a couple of books and a small fan. The furniture all matched and Holly ran her fingers over the top of the set of drawers. The desk had a box on it, but nothing else. She sat down on the bed, tracing the pattern of the headboard. Five minutes later Dean was leaning against the doorway.

"Have I told you..." Dean trailed off as he closed the door. He moved over and sat next to Holly, his hand coming to rest on her thigh. "...That you are beautiful?" Holly felt her cheeks grow into a shade of pink. It wasn't that Dean didn't compliment her often, because he did, it was the tone of his voice that got her. He had a way of speaking, softly and almost drawn out, that made her heart flutter. He tucked a few fly-away strands of hair behind her ear and his fingers brushed across her ear, followed by his lips. A shiver crept down Holly's back and her eyes fell closed. Dean pressed several gentle kisses to her neck and her head fell back, exposing more skin for Dean. His strong hands gently guided her back until she was laying down, not once taking his lips away from her skin. Neither of them were in any rush to move things along, they took their time touching and caressing, their kisses were soft yet passionate.

"You good?" Dean whispered after breaking away from another kiss. Holly nodded, a small smile appearing on her lips. She closed her eyes and let the feeling of Dean's fingers sliding under her shirt take her away. She couldn't help but love the gentle side of Dean. They had their fair share of fast, hard, love making but when he slowed everything down, when he asked '_you good?' _ it was all the more special. It was as if he was taking as much time as he could to touch her, to kiss her bare skin, to get to know her body perfectly. To say it was something magical would not be an understatement for her. She wasn't sure what Dean was thinking when these moments happened upon them, and she would one day like to know, but for now she cleared her mind and let Dean work his magic.

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Thanks for reading! Leave a review to let me know what you thought or if you would like to see anything in particular happen with Dean and Holly.


	3. Chapter 3

When Holly woke the next morning she found that Dean was not in bed with her. She untangled herself from the sheets before slipping on her underwear and pulling one of Dean's button up shirt's on. She made her way down the hallway, hearing voices growing louder. She rounded the corner to see Dean and Sam sitting at one of the tables. They hadn't noticed her as she moved quietly over to them.

"...I just don't think it's a good idea," Sam said, his tone was firm.

"What's not a good idea?" Holly asked as she came to stop behind Dean's chair.

"Good morning," Dean grinned as he pulled Holly onto his lap. To say that she looked good in his shirt was just the beginning. One hand came to rest on her hip, the other on her knee. For a second he couldn't take his eyes from her ample cleavage peeking out from behind his shirt.

"Good morning," Holly smirked. She was getting the reaction she'd hoped for. "Anyway, what's not a good idea?"

"Hunting," Dean said. He looked to Sam, who's mouth was still set in a hard line, before he continued. "We got a call earlier from a friend to say there is a rouge werewolf attacking farms a few towns over...No doubt it's heading for town,"

"Oh, and why wouldn't it be a good idea to go?" Holly asked, confused.

"Because I want you to come," Dean replied. There was no negotiations about it. Holly enthusiastically agreed she should go. Within half an hour Holly and Dean were in the Impala, Sam following behind in his own vehicle. In the two hours that it took to get there Dean explained to Holly how to kill a werewolf, the precautions they took and all of the bits in between. From the start of their relationship Dean had drilled it into Holly just how important it was to be careful and not to hesitate. She never joked around about hunting with Dean, she figured it wasn't worth an argument. Finally they pulled up at the gates of a property and were met by an older man. Brief introductions were made and a quick relay of were the werewolf was. Back in the car Dean looked to Holly.

"You still up for this?" Dean asked.

"Yep," Holly replied, although she was starting to get nervous. A short drive down a dirt road led them to a run down house and just behind that was a barn, where the werewolf was apparently finishing up a feeding session on the farmer's sheep, and the farmer. They got out of the car and Holly was instantly aware of her heart thumping in her chest. Dean pulled two guns out of the trunk and a silver blade. He placed the blade into Holly's belt on he left side, then handed her the shot gun. Sam, still with an unimpressed expression on his face, walked over to them.

"Alright Sammy, lets gank this son of a bitch!" Dean said then turned back to Holly. "Remember what I told you, stay here but if it comes out don't hesitate,"

"So she's not coming in with us?" Sam asked.

"No, I wouldn't throw her in like that, what do you think I am?" Dean looked slightly offended.

"Oh thank God!" Sam expressed. "No offence Holly,"

"None taken," she said. As she watched the brothers walk towards the barn she realised she was holding her breath. She forced herself to take several deep breaths. Back at the bunker she had been keen to come on a hunt with Dean. She had wanted to get in on all the action he so frequently talked about. Now, to be face to face with the actual thing, she was regretting her enthusiasm. Despite the copious amount of books she read, no matter how many times she asked Dean what it was like, she realised she would never have actually known until she experienced it first hand

Sam and Dean disappeared into the barn. All was quite, as if it was the calm before the storm. Then the barn doors burst open and Holly saw the unmistakable fangs that the creature bared. It was heading toward the open field next to to the barn, and beyond that was dense woods. Holly straightened, ready to take aim. Dean was only a second behind the creature. Holly realised just how quickly everything was happening. In the time it took Holly to have that thought Dean had launched himself forward and tackled the beast to the ground. She gasped, realising that Dean didn't have his gun. In the next moment he had pulled his knife and was burying it deep into the werewolf's chest. Holly knew that it would be exactly where it's heart was. A wave of relief washed over Holly, knowing the creature would be dead. She only allowed herself to fully relax when Dean stood up. He and Sam spoke for a few moment's before Sam walked her way as Dean moved back into the barn.

"You ok?" Sam asked.

"Yeah...It's different in real life than in the books," Holly replied.

"You'll get used to it," Sam said. "See you later,"

"See ya," Holly smiled and watched as Sam drove back down the dirt road. When she turned back to the barn Dean was walking out, gun in hand. He had a satisfied look on his face.

"How'd you go? Not too horrifying?" Dean asked as he placed the gun on the hood of the Impala.

"Nah I'm good," Holly said. Dean took her gun and blade before opening the trunk. He placed all of the weapons back in, then took off his over-shirt and threw it in before closing it. Dean stepped over to Holly and pinned her to the side of the Impala, his hands resting just above her shoulders. Holly reached up and grabbed Dean's toned biceps, feeling them under the fitted black tee. Then with a smirk Dean dipped his head and grazed his lips across hers then pulled away just as quickly. He stepped away from her and got into the car, started the ignition and waited. Holly bit her lip, she knew exactly what Dean was doing. She got into the car and without saying a word Dean began to drive.

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A little action for the couple...A whole lot more _action_ in the next chapter!

Thanks for reading and big thanks if you review! xx


	4. Chapter 4

**_Action_ ahead! **Just thought I'd warn you before you went any further!

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The two hour drive back to the bunker had left Holly wanting Dean more than she had before. Occasionally he would reach over to rest his hand on her leg, his fingers snaking to her inner thigh. She had asked him a couple of times to find somewhere secluded and pull over. Twice she thought he was going to but he simply turned to her and said "not long". In the back of her mind she thought she would have liked to just take care of herself then and there. It was a tempting thought but didn't eventuate any more than a thought. So she endured Dean's teasing, she let him touch her thigh, she let him flash smirks her way. When Dean finally pulled into the bunker's garage Holly jumped out of the car and quickly stood in front of him.

"Here, now," Holly said.

"No way! As much as it is tempting, if Sam gets back it's going to be awkward," Dean laughed and headed into the bunker. Holly followed, her thoughts turning to how she would like to have him here and now, on the floor, on the table, anywhere, as long as he was inside of her. Still he told her to wait and she was beginning to grown impatient. She fled to the bedroom in the hopes that Dean would give in and take her. She was sitting on the edge of the bed when Dean walked in a few minutes later.

"Why?" she asked softly.

"Because I can," Dean smirked.

"I'll remember that," Holly replied, a smile on her lips.

"You know why..." Dean whispered as he towered over Holly. Then he bent down and whispered into her ear. "Good things come to those who wait,"

"Oh, Dean," Holly breathed out. He moved silently and cupped her face in his hands, bringing them into a passionate kiss. Holly reached up and pulled Dean onto the bed, his legs either side of her waist meant she couldn't move. Her heart began to beat faster, she needed him now but she knew he was right about the waiting. She couldn't deny how good it felt after some teasing and waiting. Their kiss was long and when things started to get heated, when hands began to wander and tug at clothing, they pulled away. Dean stood up and undresses, leaving only his boxers on. Then he moved back onto the bed and pulled Holly's shirt over her head, taking a moment to cup her breasts in his hands, thumbing the black lace that covered her flesh. His fingers snaked to her jeans, working quickly to unbutton them and slide them off. He sat there taking in Holly's body, barely covered with the black lace lingerie. Holly pushed herself up and sat on the edge of the bed, knowing Dean would follow. Then she reached out and motioned to his boxers, in a matter of seconds they had been discarded on the floor.

She slid onto Dean's lap, her arms coming to rest around his neck as their eyes connected. They didn't speak, they didn't move, the moment was all they needed. Holly rolled her hips, feeling Dean through the thin fabric. She let a sigh roll off her lips, let the feeling last. Then she reached behind her and unclasped her bra. Dean's hands instantly moved up to cup her breasts, gently pinching her nipples and getting rewarded with a small moan. Holly's head fell back as Dean kissed, licked and nipped at her neck. Then he let his hands feel down her back, coming to rest on her lace covered bottom. He grabbed her soft flesh and thrust up, making contact with now wet fabric. Holly clambered from Dean's lap and quickly slipped off her underwear before sliding back onto his lap. She bit her lip as she lowered herself onto him. Her eyes fluttered shut, her head rolled back, a moan escaped her lips. She felt Dean brush his hands across her cheek, his hands sliding down past her collarbone, across her breasts and finally coming to sit on her hips. His grip was firm, telling her that she was his, and only his. She opened her eyes and looked straight into Dean's green eyes. One look said everything. Dean thrust up and Holly moaned loud and long.

"Dean!"

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Thanks for reading! I have a bit of spare time on my hands at the moment so I'm going to try and add a few chapters over the next few days. Again, let me know what you thought and if there is anything you really want to see happen with Dean and Holly! xx


	5. Chapter 5

It had not been Holly who said Dean's name. In just a few short seconds Holly's eyes flashed open and Dean's arms came up to pull her to his chest, trying desperately to cover as much of her bare skin as he could. Dean began to shoot a tirade of profanities towards the door and only when he stopped did Holly know they were alone again. Dean buried his head in Holly's shoulder, letting out an annoyed sigh. Holly cupped Dean's face in her hands, placed a kiss on his lips and slid off of him. She moved about the room and gathered her clothes, then began to dress. How she would have loved to have finished their romantic endeavour but she had to fix one little problem. Dean quickly threw on his clothes, praying that Holly wasn't going to leave. He knew that this wasn't right, that it shouldn't happen at all, let alone a third time.

He remembered the first time their sexual escapades had been interrupted. They hadn't been seeing each other for long. After a night out they were in the back of the Impala down a secluded lane way heading out of town. Their kissing was heated as Dean slid his hand under Holly's dress. Then came the knocking on the window. That was Holly's first encounter with Castiel, the first time they had met. The second time was just as bad, but at least they had been clothed,unlike now. Before he got a chance to ask what she was doing or where she was going she had flown out the door and down the hallway.

Holly was near on running when she stepped into the main room. She paused for only a few seconds as she looked around the room. Sam was sat at the middle table, Castiel standing next to him. With her face set in pure determination Holly moved over to Castiel and jerked his shoulder around so he faced her.

"Holly, I..." Castiel didn't get to finish as Holly's fist collided with his jaw.

"Three times! How dare you! Don't you know how to knock, arse-hole?!" Holly growled.

"Whoa! What's going on?" Sam jumped up and stood between the two of them. A few seconds later Sam looked to Dean who was standing in the doorway. "Dean?"

"He didn't knock," Dean said as he moved over and grabbed Holly, looking over her still clenched fist to make sure she wasn't hurt.

"Oh," Sam muttered and sat back down quickly as he realised what Dean meant.

"I'm sorry but it was urgent," Castiel said as he faced Dean, his hand still clamped to his jaw.

"It is urgent, Dean," Sam chimed in.

"Well, what is it?" Dean asked, his arm firmly around Holly's shoulders. Holly watched as Sam looked from Dean's arm and back up to his face several times. Dean nodded only very slightly, but Holly noted it. Dean didn't say anything as he led her back to the bedroom. He told her to wait there and disappeared through the door. Holly wanted to know what was happening, she wanted to be told that everything was fine. She knew that wasn't the case, the looks that the two brothers had exchanged said it all. Finally Dean reappeared, his face steely.

"What's going on?" she asked.

"I ah...I have some stuff to sort out," Dean said quickly as he grabbed Holly's handbag and passed it to her. "I need you to go home,"

"What?!" Holly couldn't believe what she was hearing. Not even ten minutes ago they were in the midst of making love and now he was telling her to leave.

"Please, just...Just trust me on this...It's not safe if you stay with me while we deal with this," Dean pleaded with her. Holly took a deep breath then reached up and kissed Dean. "I've called you a cab,"

"Call me," Holly said as she walked away from Dean and through the main room. She could feel Sam and Castiel watching her but she chose to ignore them. She knew that if something was going down Dean was only trying to protect her. When she left the bunker a cab was waiting for her. The whole way back to her apartment she realised how things had changed so quickly, the life of a hunter she thought.

She let herself into her apartment and settled onto the couch. With nothing else to do she picked up the book from the lamp table and began to read. Her phone was never far from her reach and every now and again she would check it but no calls or messages came through from Dean. To keep herself from worrying about Dean and what might be going on she continued to read through the night. She heated a frozen meal and ate on the couch, head still buried in the book. Later she poured herself a glass of wine and ran a bubble bath. She relaxed and almost fell asleep. Once out of the bath she settled onto the couch with her book and finished it. With the book now closed she glanced at the clock, _10.30_. She sighed and made her way to the bedroom, praying that Dean would call her before she fell asleep. She snuggled under the covers and closed her eyes. It wasn't long before she had fallen asleep.

The ringing was distant for a moment and Holly thought she was dreaming. Only when she felt the vibrations on her hand did she realise that it was no dream. She glanced at the time. _12.22_. Without looking at the caller ID she answered the phone, still half asleep. For a few moments there was nothing on the other end of the line.

"Hello?" Holly said into the phone. Then she heard rustling and a second later she heard Dean's voice. "Dean?"

"So you're the one who changed Dean Winchester," a female voice came down the line.

"Who is this?!" Holly demanded, her heart hammering.

"Don't worry, honey, we've got Dean back to the way we like him... Come on down to the motel just outside of town, he's in his finest form," the line went dead and Holly's heart pounded in her chest. She scrambled from the bed and pulled on some clothes. Her mind was running overtime trying to figure out what was happening. As she ran down the three flights of stairs to the underground car park she prayed that nothing had happened to Dean.

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Thanks for reading and reviewing! Something coming up in the next few chapters that could spell disaster! xx


	6. Chapter 6

Holly cut the ignition to her car and noted that there were only three other cars in the parking lot of the run down motel just on the outskirts of town. The Impala was the only car that interested her. She stayed put for a moment as questions sprung her mind. What was Dean doing here? Who was the woman on the phone? Should she have actually come here before ringing anyone else? She picked up her phone and dialled Sam's number.

"Thank God! Holly is Dean with you?" Sam was panicked.

"No, but I know where he is...Some woman called me...He's at the motel on the outskirts of town," Holly replied, her voice wavering.

"Ok...Wait...Are you there?" Sam asked.

"Yes," Holly replied. "The woman said that they had him back to the way they like him..."

"Fuck!" Sam cursed. He spoke again, this time to someone with him. "Crowley! They're at the motel just out of town!"

"What's going on?" Holly asked as confusion set in. She had never met Crowley but had heard plenty about him, that's when he heart doubled in speed. If the King of Hell was involved something was definitely not right.

"Don't go near Dean or anyone with him, they're all demons," Sam instructed before hanging up. Holly put the phone onto the passenger seat and stepped out of the car. Her mind was screaming danger but she pushed all warnings aside, Sam's included, and slowly began to move towards the room where the Impala was parked. She was half away across the parking lot when the curtain to room 24 opened and a woman looked directly at her. Holly stopped dead in her tracks and stared back. After a moment the woman closed the curtains. With a deep breath Holly urged herself to keep moving forward. She finally reached the Impala and moved to the door of room 24.  
She went to knock but stopped herself short. She could hear Dean's voice, though she couldn't clearly make out what he was saying. Seconds later something smashed and she jumped. Without a second thought she turned the door handle, surprised to find it open, and burst into the room. Her head began to spin. In front of her Dean had the same woman from the window pinned to the wall. Their lips broke apart but Dean's hands did not leave the other woman's skin. Holly felt the blood drain from her face. She swayed a little and held onto the door frame.

"Is this her?" the woman asked. Dean nodded and let the woman go. She stalked over to Holly and roughly grabbed her by the arm, throwing her inside the motel room, smirking as Holly tripped and fell to the floor. She slammed the door shut and locked it. Holly pushed herself up and came face to face with Dean.

"Dean what's going on?" Holly wasn't able to hide the fear in her voice.

"Oh, so precious..." the woman spat as she sat on the end of the bed. Holly felt her whole body begin to shake. Outside it had started to rain and she wished nothing more than to be back in her apartment where she felt safe. Dean blinked and in an instant his brilliant green eyes disappeared and pitch black was left behind. A small scream erupted from her lips and she stumbled backwards until she collided with the window. When she looked again Dean's eyes were green. Holly had read and heard about this but had never experienced it face to face. Again it was something she would have to learn from first hand. Her brow furrowed as she remembered asking about the tattoo Dean had on his chest. It's so _we can't be possessed_. Holly's only thought was that somehow the tattoo had been removed and that thought made her feel sick to the core.

Dean turned away from her and walked to the other woman where he sat down, started to whisper to her. Holly noted that her hair was a bright red, her clothes were sparse and she smelled strongly of cigarette smoke, she was not attractive in any sense of the word. Not knowing what to do she inched her way towards the door. If she timed it right she might just be able to unlock the door and make a run for it. She kept her eyes careful on the two of them as she went over the plan in her mind. Suddenly Dean shot up, something in his right hand. Holly's breath hitched and she was terrified at the sight of the blade that Dean was holding. It's leather bound handle was gripped firmly in his hand, no chance he would let it go without a fight. Along one side, her best description she had was "teeth". Dean quickly turned to face Holly and she let out a frightened scream. Frantically she fumbled with the lock and flung the door open. Through the rain she saw Sam leaping from his car, followed by Castiel and who Holly assumed was Crowley. She thought she had made it, she thought she could run but in less than a second Dean had gripped her wrist tightly and pulled her back inside. He pushed her in front of him and held her steady with one arm around her shoulders.

"Oh God!" she screamed as Dean bought the blade to her throat.


	7. Chapter 7

She felt the cold blade press to her skin, felt Dean's vice like grip around her shoulders. Her whole body was trembling, tears spilled from her eyes and she choked on sobs that she tried to suppress. In a matter of seconds Sam appeared in the doorway along with Crowley. A moment later there was a guttural groan and Dean spun around, still with Holly in his grip, to see that Castiel had appeared from thin air and plunged a blade through the female demons chest. Holly's whole world was beginning to collapse and she started to panic. The tears blinded her and she had began to mutter the same sentence over and over; "please don't kill me".

"Dean, let Holly go," Sam said, his voice firm but the fear in his eyes was evident.

"Oh come on!" Crowley had stepped forward, glancing at the sofa then thinking twice about sitting on it. "If your going to run that blade through her pretty little throat just do it, I don't have time for your silly games, squirrel,"

"I need to," Dean growled low and threatening. Holly flinched and shut her eyes tight.

"Do you, Dean? How about you hand me back the blade and then we'll decide," Crowley said, his tone casual. Holly saw Sam's eyes flash over Dean's shoulder and before she could even think why, everything changed. She felt the blade nick her skin and then Dean's grip released and she fell forward. She watched as Sam launched himself towards his brother. Holly hit the floor and quickly turned to see Sam and Castiel struggling to wrestle Dean down. She moved her hand to the side to push herself up and quickly drew back when she touched the cold of the blade. When she saw drops of blood on the edge she remember the sting she had felt only seconds ago. With shaking fingers she touched the side of her neck and drew her fingers back to see blood. She began to feel utterly sick and stumbled to her feet. She made for the door, her feet carrying her faster than she had ever moved before. The rain battered down and by the time she reached her car she was completely drenched. She started the ignition and sped away, still terrified, still seeing her world changed forever. She didn't look back, she didn't even give it a second thought.

Minutes later she came to a screeching halt in the underground car park and ran up the three flights of stairs. She flew into her apartment and locked the door before slumping to the ground and sobbing. Her whole body was convulsing with her hysterical sobs. She couldn't think straight, she couldn't see through the waterfall of tears. She shivered in her soaked clothes but was unable to get herself up from the floor. She wasn't sure how much time had passed, it could have been minutes, it could have been hours, all she knew was that she felt completely exhausted. She wondered if she actually had the strength to pull herself up and walk around or if she would just lay on the cold, hard ground and hope she had more strength when she woke up. Finally she gathered the strength to collect herself off the floor and made her way into the bathroom where she ran a steaming shower, tried to warm herself.

The rain was still coming down heavy when Dean blinked open his eyes. He looked up to see Sam, Cas and Crowley looking at his curiously. Seconds later holy water hit him in the face. He looked unimpressed and went to sit up but found he couldn't.

"Sorry, had to be sure," Sam said as he went about unshackling Dean. Nobody else spoke and Dean realised things must have been bad. He sat up and wiped his face dry.

"What the bloody hell happened?" Crowley demanded to know.

"They cornered me, too many to take on by myself. Forced me to take the blade...You know the rest," Dean said curtly. He went to stand but his head started to spin. He closed his eyes and saw it, saw everything. He saw a demon, her hair bright, he saw himself kissing her. He saw Holly, she looked terrified. He saw himself grab her, blade to her throat. He shot up, looking about the motel room frantically.

"Don't go near her Dean, you've scared her to death," Sam said, knowing exactly what Dean was looking for.

"I have to see her, I have to explain," Dean rushed as he searched for the keys to the Impala and stopped when Sam held them up.

"Just don't," Sam said, this time his tone ending the conversation.

"I'm curious as to how Dean Winchester got himself cornered and overrun by a bunch of Demons," Crowley chimed in. Dean just stared at Crowley, he didn't speak.

"It doesn't matter," Sam said. "What I'm curious to know is how they got the First Blade,"

"It happens," Crowley bit as all eyes fell on him. He picked up the First Blade and then he was gone. It was silent for a minute. Dean sat down on the edge of the bed, running his hand over his face. Sam closed the door then moved over to sit on a plastic chair that sat near a flimsy looking table. Castiel stood in the corner of the room watching the brothers.

"I thought you had the Mark under control," Sam commented. For the next hour the three men talked, although it was mainly Dean explaining in detail what had happened. He tried to make sense of how he was fine one minute and as soon as the First Blade touched his fingers he went full on demon. Castiel offered him some answers and Sam tried to reassure him that things would be ok and that he could keep himself under control, that everybody had a relapse now and then. When the room had become silent and nobody spoke for several minutes Dean's mind began to remind him of what he had done.


	8. Chapter 8

"I have to go," he said as he stood up.

"She's terrified, Dean...Be careful," Sam said softly to his brother. He knew exactly what he had meant. Even though he would have much rather Dean wait until the next day he could see the anguish in his eyes. Dean just nodded and flew to the Impala. He sped towards Holly's apartment not entirely sure if that's where she would be but it was the best place to start. He couldn't imagine she would have gone to the bunker. Several times he almost caused accidents but eventually he cut the ignition and ran into the apartment building. He took the stairs two at a time and arrived at Holly's door. He steadied himself with a few deep breaths before knocking, counting the seconds until he heard Holly walk to the door.

"Who is it?" Holly asked, her voice was shaky.

"It's me," Dean said softly as he placed his hand on the door. There was a rustling and then he heard the lock unlatch. He took a step back and waited. Holly opened the door and Dean raised his hands instantly. Holly was holding a blade and it was pointed squarely at Dean. He noticed the blade almost immediately, he had given it to Holly only a few months ago, made her promise she would look after herself and that was exactly what she was doing.

"Don't come near me," Holly spat but the tears had already begun to fall onto her cheeks. Dean didn't move, he didn't speak. He watched her take a step back then she ran from the apartment, slipping between him and the wall.

Dean glanced into Holly's apartment, only for a seconds but it was long enough to note that her car keys were still on the side table. He ran down the two flights of stairs, again taking two at a time. When he emerged into the raining night he spotted Holly fleeing down the street. His heart was aching as he recalled the fear in her eyes. He had never wanted to hurt her, her never want to frighten her and yet in a small amount of time he had done both of those things. He's destroyed the one thing he loved and he wasn't sure how to deal with that. His legs carried him faster than he'd ever gone before, he had to make things right. Dean watched as she sprinted around the corner and into the park. He noticed that the knife was no longer in her hands and he hoped she had dropped it, he didn't particularly feel like been stabbed tonight, he was already in pain. In a few long strides he was behind Holly. He reached out and grabbed her arm.

"Get away from me!" she screamed.

"Please, Holly, just listen to me..." Dean pleaded. Holly was fighting with all of her strength to get out of Dean's grip, and he thought she just might accomplish it. Dean couldn't describe the feeling in his chest, it was something like fear, heartache and total destruction all mixed into one. It was unbearable. He let go of Holly's arm and watched as she took several steps backwards. He braced himself for her to run and told himself he would not go after her again if she did. The fear in her eyes was now enough to tell him that he needed to back off.

"I thought you loved me," Holly growled.

"I do...It wasn't me back there..." Dean answered, although he knew it was a lie. He thrust his right arm out and pointed to what Holly thought was just a scar. "It was the Mark..."

"What the fuck is that?" Holly retorted.

"It's...It's hard to explain..." Dean sighed. "Please, let's just go inside and I will tell you everything,"

"No! I'm not going anywhere with you...How do I know I can trust you?" Holly asked. She was trying to keep her voice strong but it was wavering. The street light not far from them was dim and didn't help much but it was enough light that Holly could see the pain on Dean's face. She watched as he struggled with himself to find the right words, the words that might just bring her back to him.

"I..." Dean stopped, looked into Holly's sad, hazel eyes and then took a deep breath. "Because I love you."

"Do you?" she challenged. Dean didn't speak. He didn't move. He knew that he loved Holly, he had to figure out a way to prove that to her. He wracked his mind for the answer, hoping that he would find it soon. He wanted her to understand everything. He needed her to love him and right now it seemed that she was heartbroken and had dismissed anything to do with the love. He didn't blame her though, he knew what he had done was the perfect recipe to end things between them.

"You're here," all of a sudden he knew what he had to say. "If I didn't love you then tell me why you're here? If I didn't fight the demon then you wouldn't be here,"

"Show me your tattoo!" Holly demanded. Dean knew why she wanted to see it, he knew that she wouldn't understand.

"It's there," Dean sighed but still pulled the neck of his shirt down. Holly's breath hitched, she could see the tattoo still there on his chest. Warily she stepped closer. Her hands were shaking as she reached out and gingerly ran her fingers across the embedded ink. She couldn't deny that that tattoo was there. It took a moment for everything to sink in. She recalled Dean's words before he sent her back to her apartment, she thought about the specific wording that Sam had used on the phone.

"H...how?" she stammered.

"The Mark of Cain," Dean said simply. He had to explain everything but for now that was the best he could come up with. They stood for a moment as the rain continued to pour down, both processing everything that had been said. Again Holly reached out and her fingers lingered over the tattoo on Dean's chest. Dean reached up and pressed Holly's hand to his chest, he held it firmly. Only a moment later Holly began to sob again, this time she didn't try to hold anything back. Her body shook and a wailing rose from her throat, it was raw and real. She felt her legs give way and seconds later she had fallen to the water sodden ground. She gave in and let all of her guards down, she didn't want to try any more. All her efforts had been exhausted in such a short time that she had no fight left. She let Dean take her into his arms, let him hold her close to his chest as she sobbed. She only had one thought in that moment; _Why?_

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Thanks for reading! x


	9. Chapter 9

Dean blinked his eyes open and sat up. Rubbing a hand over his face he sighed. It had been almost two weeks since the incident, two weeks since he carried Holly back into her apartment, wrapped her in blankets and made her hot tea. He'd then spent hours explaining the Mark of Cain; what it was, how he got it, how he thought he had it under control. Now he prayed every day that things would improve. That night in the park, while he held Holly in the pouring rain as she fell apart, he began to remember why he never let himself love before. He was always too afraid that he would put someone in danger, that it would destroy the one he loved. Now that was a horror coming true. Holly was so withdrawn that he was terrified he would never see her beautiful smile again. It broke his heart to see her forcing a smile and telling everyone she was fine, when clearly she was not. For the first time in two weeks he had stayed at Holly's apartment. It had been the most time they had spent together as well. He hadn't slept much at all, lying on the couch and staring at the ceiling. The night before it broke his heart when he watched Holly disappear into her bedroom silently, locking the door behind her. Lost in his thoughts he was surprised when he heard Holly moving about the kitchen.

"Morning," he said softly as he walked into the kitchen.

"Morning," Holly whispered as she picked up her cup of coffee and slid past Dean quickly. She sat on the couch and sipped on her coffee. At times she thought she was been silly and overreacting to the whole situation. Then she would remember the callous look on Dean's face, the way he put that blade to her throat, the soulless, black eyes that had looked right through her. The thought made her shiver and she hugged her jumper closer to her. Dean sat at the opposite end of the couch, his fingers toying with the hem of his shirt. She had foolishly thought that Dean would not take her up on the offer to stay the night, but he did. Holly went about her normal routine, acting as if Dean was not sitting restlessly on the couch. By midday Dean couldn't take it any more. Holly was in the bedroom putting away a pile of clean laundry when he walked in.

"Can we please talk?" Dean asked, stepping over to sit on the end of the bed.

"About?" Holly's response was short.

"Anything...What can I do to make things better?" it was the same question he had been asking her repeatedly.

"Like I said, Dean, I don't think you can make it better," Holly refused to look at Dean, instead she continued to fold clothes and put them away.

"Holly, I miss you," Dean sighed the truth. He missed everything about her. Their late night conversations about nothing in particular, the way she would smile, her laugh, little things she did;he missed it all. He wanted nothing more than to reach out and hold her close, he wanted to kiss her, even if it was just once.

"I think you should go,"Holly muttered. Her back was turned but she heard Dean stand up. She didn't turn around, she couldn't. The tears in her eyes threatened to spill down her cheeks if she did. She listened to his footsteps and then the door closed with a gentle thud. Only then did she sit on the bed, her voice a whisper "I miss you too,"

Dean sat on the edge of his bed, a glass in one hand, the bottle in the other. He sipped at the whiskey, letting it roll down it throat as he tried to drown out the pain he felt. Despite acting like such a tough guy he came to realise very quickly over the past two weeks that the act only lasts for so long. He placed the bottle on the bedside table and reached out to pick up the thick, tattered journal that was his fathers. He flipped open the front cover and picked up the photo he had placed there.

"How'd you do it, Dad?" he asked to the silence of the room as he stared at the picture of his mother and father, smiles on their faces, love in their eyes. He finished off the drink in his hand, the glass connecting with the bedside table with just a little too much force. He hadn't realised that a single tear had rolled down his cheek. A knock on his bedroom door had him quickly stashing the photo back into the journal. He wiped his face and cleared his throat.

"Dean?" Sam asked from the other side of the door.

"Yeah," Dean managed to get out. When Sam walked in the first thing he spotted was the nearly empty bottle of whiskey. He looked to his brother, concern plastered on his face.

"Are you ok?" Sam asked as he sat next to Dean even though he already knew the answer.

"Fine," Dean responded but he knew he wasn't fine, he knew that Sam was all too aware he wasn't fine. Sam gave Dean's shoulder a squeeze before he left the room. He'd seen Dean drink before, and it got worse when things were bad, but this was out of control. Dean had no sooner arrived back at the bunker and he was drinking, he hadn't stopped since, and it was now nearing eight o'clock. He sat down at the table and pulled out his phone.

"Hello?"

"Holly, it's Sam," he said.

"What do you want?" Holly snapped.

"Just hear me out...It's Dean, he's not coping...He regrets everything, he hates himself for what he did. He's drunk nearly a whole bottle of whiskey since he got back from your place. I know your angry with him, I know what he did was wrong and I understand that you are traumatised from it...But please just give him a chance, let him say what he needs to say to you..." Sam's voice was soft and pleading.

"I... I'll think about it," Holly whispered.

"Thank you," Sam hung up and breathed a sigh of relief. It wasn't much but it was a start. He knew he couldn't change what happened, he knew he couldn't make either of them feel better but if he could get one of them to budge it was a step in the right direction. He opened his laptop and started to browse the news articles, searching for something of interest that might help Dean get back into the swing of things. Hours passed and Sam realised that Holly was not coming. He closed his laptop and went to bed, hoping Dean would be ok.


	10. Chapter 10

Holly braced herself, took a deep breath and stepped through the door. Her heart was racing as she descended the stairs. It was the first time in a month that she had been back to the bunker. Two week previous Dean had stayed at her apartment for the night. After that he tried to mend things one more time and she allowed him to stay one more night after Sam called her to say that Dean was drinking a lot. To say things didn't end well was an understatement. With Holly screaming at Dean she showered him in angry words and profanities and he just stood there, letting her get it all out. When silence finally fell around them she had slumped onto the couch and waited for Dean to say something, but he didn't and instead he left without a word. Holly called him two days later to apologise, she hadn't meant any of the stuff she had screamed at him.

It had been a week since she had last seen or spoken to Dean. Sometimes he didn't answer her calls and sometimes he would say so little Holly would end the call. It wasn't like a movie, they didn't get back together a week later, it had taken a month to get this far and it wasn't easy. Holly walked through the bunker, there was no sign of anyone around. She came to a stop outside of Dean's door, knocked on the door and waited but there was no answer. A few moments passed before she opened the door.

"Dean!" she gasped to herself, finding it hard to believe what she was seeing. Empty bottles of alcohol were everywhere, takeaway food containers were stacked high on the desk, it was more than what Sam had described. Dean was laying on his bed, no doubt with a very severe hangover, if he wasn't still intoxicated, and in an alcohol induced sleep if he was. Holly made her way over to the bed and gingerly reached out to touch Dean's shoulder. He didn't stir at all and she put her fingers near his mouth to make sure he was breathing. She was about to leave when she noticed Dean had something in his hand. Quietly she reached down and pried the photo from his fingers. A couple and two young children all sat together, smiling. Holly took in everything from the picture. The way the man's arm was draped protectively around the woman's shoulders. A little boy sat on his lap, brilliant green eyes glistening. The woman held a baby wrapped snugly in a blanket. Holly flipped the picture over to see writing in the top left corner. _Me, John, Dean and Sam. Our beautiful family. _She bit her lip and placed the picture next to Dean before leaving the room.

Dean reached blindly for his ringing phone, still half asleep. He answered and listened to Sam giving details about the hunt he was on. Bleary eyed he made his way out of the bedroom and headed for the kitchen, he needed a drink. He turned the corner, looked up and stopped. He stared at Holly for a moment as his heart skipped a beat. He wasn't expecting her and she had not rung him, he felt like a child being busted for stealing. He must have been silent long enough for Sam to realise something was up.

"Dean?" Sam asked down the line.

"Yeah, I've gotta go Sammy," Dean ended the call and walked over to the table. He let his phone drop onto the wooden surface.

"Hi Dean," Holly said softly.

"Hi..." Dean was still shocked to see her. He pulled out a chair and sat beside her. "What are you doing here?'

"I came to see you," she replied unfolding her arms.

"You did? You should have called...I would have cleaned up a bit..." Dean started.

"Do you mean clean up the bottles in your room?" Holly came straight out with complete honesty. She knew it would sting but it had to be done. "What are you thinking? Drinking that much will kill you,"

"I..It's...It's the only way I know how to deal," Dean admitted, lowering his head.

"Christ! You need to stop," Holly tried to stay calm but the thought of Dean drinking himself to death scared her too much. She may have been angry with a lot of things Dean did but it didn't mean she wanted anything to happen to him. "You're no good to me drunk...Or dead,"

"What?" Dean didn't want to get his hopes up, he wanted to make sure they were both on the same page.

"I think...Well, what I want to say first is... I want to be able to trust you again and I hope you can see why I hesitated...But I think I've started to come to terms with everything that has happened, I think I'm ready to give us another shot," Holly said, her hand moving out to touch Dean's arm. "But slowly,"

"You're sure?" Dean was treading carefully. Remembering a few of the conversations he and Sam had over the past month he knew he had to be patient. In a way he couldn't believe he was taking relationship advice from his little brother.

"I'm sure," Holly said and for the first time she smiled. It wasn't a forced smile, it was as natural and as beautiful as Dean remembered. He didn't think as he propelled himself towards Holly, cupping her face in his hands and crashing their lips together. It was a fierce but meaningful kiss, something that he didn't want to end. When he finally broke away he couldn't read the expression in her eyes. He waited for her to say something but she didn't. He watched as she stood up and for a moment he feared she might walk away but instead she smiled again.

"Slowly," Holly grinned.

"Oh...Right..." Dean stepped back and begun to look around the bunker. He hadn't left his room much, only to get more alcohol or food.

"Ok then...I think maybe you should have a shower," Holly suggested. "While you do that I'm going to clean up your room,"

"I can do it," Dean replied quickly.

"Dean...Let me do it, unless you've got a naked girl in that mess I'm sure there's nothing in there I haven't seen before," Holly's tone was firm. Dean just nodded and walked away. Holly walked back to Dean's room with a garbage bag and began to tidy up. She knew that getting things back on track would be no walk in the park but after having the time to think things out she had decided she wanted to take that leap. A small smile appeared on her face at the prospect of having their lives get back to normal...Well, as normal as a life with Dean Winchester could be.

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Well, that wraps up Beautiful Lies. Thank you to everybody who read it. It was fun to write and I loved hearing what you thought. I have another idea ready to put down but I would like to know if anyone would like to see more of Dean and Holly? xx


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N**: After a bit of a break I've come upon some fresh ideas and have decided to continue on with this story for a bit longer. Hope you all enjoy. Let me know what you think! xx

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Dean glanced around the warehouse but couldn't see Holly. He grasped the blade in his right hand more tightly and took a deep breath. Trying not to panic was becoming almost impossible. The silence was so thick it sent a shiver down his spine. He turned slowly, looking into every corner and every gap hoping to spy her. Suddenly there was a rustle behind him and he spun around. Holly stood across the room from him, a smirk on her lips. His hands began to shake as she started to step closer to him. He tried to call out to her, to tell her to stop, but when he opened his mouth nothing came out. He tried again and anguish rushed over him as he failed. In a matter of seconds Holly's eyes blinked into black pits. She began to run at him and his panic bubbled over. In vain he tried screaming for her but it was no use. She came towards him faster and faster until he moved in one swift motion. The blade pierced through her, right to the hilt, and he felt the blood begin to seep through her shirt and onto his fist which was still clenched around the handle of the blade. She fell limply into his arms and he pulled the blade from her chest, letting it clatter to the floor. He crumpled to the ground with Holly still in his arms and through cold, lifeless hazel eyes she stared at him.

"No!" Dean yelled. He flung himself up and looked around the darkness, his hand frantically searching the bed until it came in contact with warm, soft skin. It had all been a dream. Dean's heart slowly started to return to its normal pace. He rubbed his hand across his face and swung his legs out of bed. He opened the door, and the dim light of the hallway cast itself onto Holly, watching her for a moment as she slept peacefully. As he walked away from the bedroom he was glad he hadn't woken her this time.

The nightmares had started only once they had gotten things back on track, about three weeks previous. For the first week Holly would wake each time Dean cried out in the middle of the night. They would sit, cuddled together, while Holly reminded him that everything was fine. Now, he would lie to her about the nightmares, not wanting her to worry. Tonight's nightmare had been particularly horrible and he wanted nothing more than for Cas to wipe his mind clean of it. When Dean stopped walking he found himself in the kitchen. He opened a cupboard and reached into the back corner until his fingers met with a bottle. He sat down at the table and opened the bottle, taking a swig of the whiskey, not bothering with a glass. He quickly came to realise he was also lying to Holly about drinking as well. Having drunk another few mouthfuls of whiskey he capped the bottle, placed it back into the cupboard, subconsciously placing a few rolls of paper towel in front of it, and headed for the bathroom.

The water was steaming as Dean stepped under it's spray. He let his shoulders start to relax and leant his head against the wall of the shower. The contrast of the steaming water with the cool tiles sent goosebumps up his arms. He let time slip away from him as he started to fully unwind from the horrors of not so long ago. He knew that Holly had forgiven him and that things were starting to return to normal. Apparently Holly was all of a sudden gaining enough confidence, and believed in them as a couple, that she was talking about leaving her apartment and moving into the bunker full time. Although Dean was more than ok with that idea they hadn't spoken to Sam about it, nor had they spoken much about it to each other. He stepped from the shower and dried off, slipping back on his boxer shorts, before going back to the bedroom. He laid in bed for hours but sleep did not come to greet him. He tossed and turned but could not get comfortable. Each time he moved he prayed he wouldn't wake Holly. The last time he glanced at his phone the time was 5:07 am. Some time after that he somehow managed to fall asleep.

Holly woke and hopped out of bed, leaving Dean snoring softly. She showered and dressed before making her way into the kitchen. Having made herself more at home here than she ever had previously she had stocked up the cupboards and fridge with more healthy and nutritious foods than Dean had previously had. She cut up her regular bowl of fruit, added a few dollops of Greek yoghurt and made her way to sit at the table. She opened her laptop and began to scan the latest news articles, on the lookout for anything suspicious they might be able to look into. By the time she had finished her breakfast nothing had caught her eye. She moved back into the kitchen to clean up after herself and when she walked back out Sam was heading toward her.

"Morning," he said.

"Good morning," Holly replied.

"Dean still in bed?" Sam asked.

"Yeah, he's been sleeping in lately," Holly said, smiling at the fact he was finally relaxing a bit.

"No wonder, he was up at about two a.m." Sam retorted.

"He was?" Holly looked puzzled.

"Yeah, I heard him in the bathroom, the shower was running, would have had to have been in there for at least half an hour," Sam commented as he moved into the kitchen. Holly's brow furrowed and she moved off down the hallway, unsure what to make of the new information. She stood in the doorway watching Dean for some time, trying to figure out how long he had been awake during the night, only to leave him exhausted and sleeping well past eight in the morning. She could only think of one reason as to why he would be doing this.


	12. Chapter 12

Life has been crazy for quite some weeks but finally I have been able to sit down and do a bit of writing. Hopefully I can get some regular updates done over the next week or so.

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Holly had been waiting in the main room for several hours. She had ended up taking a book from the shelf and tried reading but her mind was too occupied with thoughts of Dean. When she finally looked at the book properly she realised it was about Demons. She rolled her eyes and roughly placed the book onto the table. She had been planning on asking Dean if he wanted to head out to lunch today but she now felt that the mood would be ruined after she confronted him. Eventually he emerged, showered and dressed, into the room. Holly got up and stood in front of him, ready to get everything out in the open.

"Morning," he grinned and kissed her lips gently. Holly couldn't believe how well he had been pulling off the act of being fine. She had honestly just thought that Dean was actually beginning to relax and take life a bit more steadily.

"Morning..." Holly's voice gave her away and Dean's expression changed immediately. "Can we talk?"

"Sure, what's up?" he asked and stepped around Holly to sit down.

"Well...I just want to know...Are you still having trouble sleeping?" Holly questioned.

"Shit," Dean muttered to himself, so quietly that Holly almost missed it. He rubbed his hand over his face and Holly now noticed the dark circles under his eyes.

"Dean, if you're not sleeping you can get help for it...There's drugs, herbal teas... All sorts of stuff," Holly explained. "But please don't lie to me,"

"I'm sorry," he apologised. "I just worry..."

"About what?" she asked.

"I worry that I might overload you with my problems and you might leave," Dean admitted softly.

"Seriously? Dean, if I was 'overloaded with your problems' I wouldn't be sitting here asking you to share them with me," Holly sighed.

"I guess so," Dean gave Holly a small smile then got up and moved into the kitchen. Holly breathed a sigh of relief and made her way back to the bedroom, it hadn't been as bad as she was anticipating. She settled onto the bed and picked up her book from the bedside table. As she read she listened for Dean's footsteps but he didn't come and soon she was immersed in the pages of the book.

She spent the majority of the day in the bedroom reading. Finally in the afternoon Dean made a few appearances and all seemed fine. At dinner Sam left them to eat at the table while he went out, not disclosing where he was going or exactly what he was doing. Eventually they finished eating and cleaned up. The evening wore on and they found themselves once again cuddled on the bed as they watched a film, something that had now become a regular habit.

Holly had fallen asleep about halfway through the movie and Dean gently moved her off of his chest and onto the bed. He switched the TV off and made sure Holly was still sleeping soundly before he crept out of the room. A part of him knew what he was about to do was wrong and that he shouldn't be lying to Holly, but a part of him was terrified and he couldn't face the truth. Once again he reached into the cupboard, behind the rolls of paper towel, and pulled out the bottle of whiskey. He moved into the main room and settled into an armchair that was placed in the far corner of the room. He flicked on a lamp and sighed when it only emitted a dim, pale light. Instead of drinking straight from the bottle tonight he opted for a glass. The first couple of glasses disappeared rather quickly and his throat burned a little. He slowed down with the next few glasses, sipping at the alcohol and staring at the wall. He didn't even glance at the time but he presumed it was late by the time he finally capped the bottle and headed for bed.


End file.
